Little Sleeper

Dear Will,

Thank you for letting your parents sleep in these last few days. We are hoping you are practicing for the time change that will happen in a few weeks when we fall back an hour. While it is nice to sleep in a bit, we do miss having more time with you in the morning before work. But like all things so far, this is probably a phase and soon enough you will be getting up at 630am again. So, I guess we will enjoy these times and get some extra z's while we can.

Sweet dreams little love!

On a roll

Will had been on a roll. He had slept through the night for the past 6 weeks.

At our last trip to the pediatrician, Will was 4m old and he had just started waking up in the night after weeks of getting a full nights rest. As of the day of our doctor's appointment, it had been 5 nights in a row where Will suddenly woke up crying. Everytime we walked in, Will would smile big and kick with excitement. What mom doesn't love to see that? So, I would swoop down and pick him up, hold him, offer him a bottle, and then put him back to bed.

When telling the pediatrican about our woes, she immediately recognized us for the rookies that we are and pointed out the error of our ways. Will didn't need us. He just woke up and wanted to play. He really wasn't even hungry, but as our pediatrician said, if someone offered you chocolate cake in the middle of the night - would you turn them down? So we got the message loud and clear... it was time for the dreaded experience of crying it out.

Oh how I didnt want to do this! It is really hard for me to hear that little guy cry and not run in and see that smiling face and watch him kick. (I just love the kicks!) How sweet it is that he stops crying just with our presence! Luckily, we found a great book that made us feel much better about crying it out.

So that night we put him down for bed. We first heard his cries at 10:30pm. I told Chad to come get me in 10 minutes if he was still crying, then I went to the other end of the house, closed the door and turned up the tv. I was going to have to hiberate to get through this! After listening to the cry for maybe a minute longer, Chad walked in the room - he couldn't take it either. We just sat there, watching the monitor/Will TV and wondered if we could do this! Would he stop crying? Our pediatrician said that as long as we know Will is ok, we could let him cry it out as long as it takes or, more likely, as long as we could take it. I just wasn't sure how long I could take it. Thankfully, Will stopped in 10 minutes. He woke up again around 4am, and the same thing happened. This happened for 2 nights in a row, we let him cry, and since then we haven't heard a peep from him during his typical 13 hour slumber.

Well, until last night. Last night we heard Will start to cry around 4:30am. While I think we both were surprised, we looked at the monitor and could see him moving. We decided everything was ok and just to let him cry. A very slow and painful 10 minutes passed, and I had to go check on him. Good thing, because the boy was stuck! He had his head cocked way back (the uncomfortable position I have mentioned before) and his facewas pressed up against the side of the crib. I assume he couldnt figure out how to move his feet so he could get his head out of that awful position. I felt just terrible for letting that little boy cry knowing now that he was stuck! It actually took a little while to calm him down. I think he was a bit scared.

And then it was just the sweetest thing to sit there and rock him. I love letting him snuggle up against me and burrow his head into my arms. Once he calmed down, he looked at me and smiled. For a moment I missed those early nights when he wasn't sleeping through the night. I always enjoyed the night time feedings as they were so peaceful. There is something so serene about rocking a little baby in a dark room with lullabies in the background. There are no distractions. It was a great time for reflection and to give thanks for the gift of motherhood.

Today I am a little more tired, but I think it is those little special moments that I will remember. I won't remember that I was tired today, or how great I felt on the nights when I got a good nights sleep when I was not awakened by his cries. I surely will remember laying in bed, watching the clock for the 10 minute mark, walking in his room to find he was stuck!, calming him down, and then...the smile as if to tell me he was ok. It is these sweet tender moments that will stay with me forever.

Side Sleeper

Will has always slept on his side - even when he was first born. He has always slept in this exact position - with his head tilted back. It looks terribly uncomfortable to me, but he obviously doesn't think so. I went in to check on him as I do every night before I go to bed - I can see him on the monitor (also known as Will TV), but it isn't the same as seeing him in person. Seeing him sleep always makes me smile - not only on the outside, but also deep down inside as well. It can change your mood from sad to happy. I cant explain it, but it is the sweetest thing.

Tonight he had the pancake bear (from his Aunt Amye) between his arms like he was hugging him, but when I went back with my camera, the pancake bear was face to face with him. Every night we put him down with the pancake bear, giraffe or duck blankie (courtesy of Julie), and a silky blankie (from his Aunt Leen). I am hoping he will become attached to one or all of these. He likes to hold his blankies in his hands while he is trying to fall asleep - he opens and closes his hand, regrabbing them time and time again. I think it is calming and soothing for him.

I had a blankie when I was growing up. Well, I had many. Surely I had a favorite, but I just remember always having a blankie. I was embarrassed about it, and I remember that on my last day of preschool, we were cleaning out our bins where we kept our things. I left my blankie in the bin because I didn't want anyone to know I had it. I guess I would sneak it out during nap time. Anyway, my teacher found it and held it up in front of the whole class and asked "Whose blankie is this?" I was too embarrassed to claim it, so when my mom picked me up on that sad day, I had to tell her the terrible news. We went back the next day to reclaim my prized possession. I was thrilled to get that thing back! When we got there, the janitors repurposed it...as a rag! They were cleaning with it! This is one of my earliest memories - maybe because it must have scarred me.

After that, I remember taking my blankie to sleepovers with friends. I would take it out before bed and tell them that I had to lay on this "special blankie" because I had a back problem. Seriously. I remember saying those exact words to Jennifer Monoghan, my best friend from elementary school, before we went to bed one night after playing My Little Pony. Today I find that memory hysterical. I assume my friends didn't think anything of it since I don't have any bad memories about sleepovers and the blankie.

So I am not sure if Will is going to follow in my footsteps and attach himself to a blankie, but if he does, I hope he carries that blankie with pride, or, if he needs to, maybe he can use that hereditary back problem as an excuse.